One day, a friend of mine told me that I have a great voice but I lack power and he could sense that I would even go chesty at times. He is a really dear friend of mine and he always tells the truth. And that's why when he said that, it occur to me why.
I lack confidence. I do admit my poor self esteem at times, but it never dawn into me that even my singing shows it. That's why it's very hard for me to sing alone on a stage because I tend to think while singing instead of feeling the song. And if I'm in a band, my spirit soars high knowing I'm not alone in this.
I remember Deo telling me to do something in my life that he'll be proud of me when friends and acquaintances start asking about me. After a broken heart, my life never got better and I just end up making wrong decisions and making more enemies than I can handle. And when I try to reach out, I'd be misunderstood. So I opted to become an anti-social. I get away from crowded places and never dared to gain interest in the most trivial of things. And when I do, they'd think I'm too shallow. Somehow, I am still lost for whoever I wanna become.
But when he died, I regretted missing the chance to make him proud of me. And when Kuya Chuck died, I regretted again. I wonder how many regrets should I come across to just to wake me up for my dreams. I wonder how many souls do I have to sing to and never hear their cheers for me ever again. Was I being selfishly impulsive? I hope not. I dun wanna be.
And yet here I am on a familiar scene, avoiding work so I can pursue my dreams. Somehow, I feel I'm getting too old for escaping the harsh realities of adulthood. I still can't quite get how should I do things.
My brother Lex found a new music studio near the store and his school and he plans to reactivate our band status. I'm really glad that he still believes we can play. I'm planning to relearn my voice again by my friend from a choir. I really wanna do this. I just hope nothing will come in our way.
I lack confidence. I do admit my poor self esteem at times, but it never dawn into me that even my singing shows it. That's why it's very hard for me to sing alone on a stage because I tend to think while singing instead of feeling the song. And if I'm in a band, my spirit soars high knowing I'm not alone in this.
I remember Deo telling me to do something in my life that he'll be proud of me when friends and acquaintances start asking about me. After a broken heart, my life never got better and I just end up making wrong decisions and making more enemies than I can handle. And when I try to reach out, I'd be misunderstood. So I opted to become an anti-social. I get away from crowded places and never dared to gain interest in the most trivial of things. And when I do, they'd think I'm too shallow. Somehow, I am still lost for whoever I wanna become.
But when he died, I regretted missing the chance to make him proud of me. And when Kuya Chuck died, I regretted again. I wonder how many regrets should I come across to just to wake me up for my dreams. I wonder how many souls do I have to sing to and never hear their cheers for me ever again. Was I being selfishly impulsive? I hope not. I dun wanna be.
And yet here I am on a familiar scene, avoiding work so I can pursue my dreams. Somehow, I feel I'm getting too old for escaping the harsh realities of adulthood. I still can't quite get how should I do things.
My brother Lex found a new music studio near the store and his school and he plans to reactivate our band status. I'm really glad that he still believes we can play. I'm planning to relearn my voice again by my friend from a choir. I really wanna do this. I just hope nothing will come in our way.
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