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It occur to me that ever since I have been given the gift of singing, I have been cheered on by so many people, strangers and friends alike. With this spread of positivity, I was encouraged to join the allegedly famous talent reality shows such as "Pilipinas Got Talent" and "Pinoy Dream Academy."

As you all know I have already auditioned for PDA (Pinoy Dream Academy) 4 years ago and posted a blog entry about it here (if you missed it, here's the post: link). The rejection was one of the most fatal blows in my life and it reverberated in the years after that, that even giving in to my mother's wishes for what my life should be like had become my fuel for living. I began to forget my dreams. That episode in my life I already wrote it here (link).

My mother, no matter how supportive she is, is not comfortable with the idea of me pursuing a musical career. She is the most definite existence known in the universe as the eternal rationalistic. That is enough reason for me to stop talking to her about the future I want for myself.

Now I laugh at the thoughts of the people around me. PDA? PGT? Personally, I have already left the dream of making it through them, but I have never given up on my dreams. My PDA rejection catapulted me into somewhere higher than I know. Though it was very depressing at first, it never stopped me from aiming higher than before.

So why did I laugh? Lemme ask you then. Why would I go back? It's clear that these things are not for me. So why would I wanna embarrass myself? They do not need me, so why would I need them? I sang in front of them once and they have failed to unwrap the package. It's not my fault if they prefer the wrappings than what's inside.

But when I hear people talk to me about auditioning for the shows, I just smirk and the first thing that comes into my mind is : "I have bigger dreams than that."

Experience is the best teacher in life. The rejection led me downward until I were then discovered by Popong Landero, one of the most influential artists in the city, to which I have higher respects for than the judges of the talent reality shows. He complimented me very much as to having such an amazing voice with genuine clearness to it and powerful enough to deliver a quality tune.

That compliment led me to many things, including the president of SAMADhI (Samahan ng mga Musikeros sa Davao, Inc.) Madam Sandra's invitation to sing in one of the stages I've been dreaming to perform in: Taboan at Matina Town Square.

And after performing so many times there, I met musicians new and old from all walks of life in the city. It's one of the most dreadful things I am most anxious about, but it turns out that there are great people to be with.

And my most recent achievement is having to perform in front of 10,000 people at the Solidarity Rally for Inday Sara. The crowd even cheered and sang with us. It was one of the most exciting moments I've ever had.

I'm sure the people around me wants to see me up there achieve higher than what I have. For me, that is a level lower than now. I'm sure you are about as curious what kind of dreams do I have in life.

It is still the same, a musical career, but this time I have laid out every detail that I specifically want. I want to be recording rock artist with a full band in Europe, possibly more into gothic genre or anything that rocks hard with upcoming world tours. And with the suggestion of my beloved cousin in Germany, I will soon grab hold of my dreams and live them. I can't wait!

I am confident and it very rare when I am, but when I am given a small window of opportunity, there is no denying that I will instantly climbed into it with everything I've got. I don't wanna live in regret in the coming years of my life when it is this near to reach them.

And to those who still think that I must climb these steps a little slower than going to Europe for my dreams by joining these shows: like I said, I have bigger dreams than that.